"I will take you, I will bring you to unbelievable heights of ecstasy, on one condition.
Tell me, Swear to me my love, that I am sexier than that despicable Jack Sparrow."
"Oh my darling. I am in the middle of a bromance. I'm afraid I cannot bed you tonight."
I may be no Gerard Butler, but my loins are on fire for you Cara.
"Haven't you heard Belinda? I am gay, oh yes I am!
We can never be together for I am madly in love with your brother!"
Meanwhile, where is Fabio?
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